|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
"I Thought We'd Never Speak Again is an impressive, deep, and thorough guide to relationship healing."
Wendy Maltz, M.S.W.
|
|
|
|
|
Welcome to the LauraDavis.net message boards. I'm Laura Davis and I'm so glad you dropped in. I want
you to make yourself at home on these boards, to become an integral part of an exciting community of
people who are committed to increasing peace and harmony in their families, their communities, and in
the world. If you have a relationship you want to heal, a rift you'd like to mend, or a commitment to
bring more understanding into the world, you've come to the right place.
We want to hear about the struggles and challenges you face in mending damaged relationships. We want
to celebrate your successes and commiserate with you when you have setbacks. Our growing online
community will cheer you, support you, and nourish you.
These boards are the heart and soul of LauraDavis.net. Through your posts, you can communicate with
other people from all over the world who are interested in reconciliation-any time of the day or night.
Your posts also let me know, as your host, what concerns you, and what you want to learn more about.
Knowing what you're thinking helps me know what to feature in the newsletter, what to devote space
to on the site, and even what book to write next.
Whether you are a first time visitor to online communities, or a seasoned veteran, I ask you to take a
few moments to review our house rules and our guidelines for sharing. Reading them ensures that we're
all on the same page-and that we keep our community safe for everyone.
House Rules for Discussion Boards and Chat Rooms
Guidelines for Sharing Personal Information
By posting information or otherwise participating in any chat room, message board, newsgroup, or other
interactive service available on LauraDavis.net, you agree to abide by the following rules and guidelines:
- We live by words online, so we don't allow obscene, racist,
sexist, homophobic, or sexually explicit language. Language that
victimizes, harasses, degrades, or intimidates an individual or group
of individuals, based on their religion, gender, sexual orientation,
race, ethnicity, age, or disability will not be tolerated. We reserve
the right to remove notes that are hostile, threatening, abusive, or
hateful. We also reserve the right to remove notes that are off the
subject or not in English.
- We reserve the right to remove postings that are deceptive,
fraudulent, libelous, or invasive of another person's privacy. Any
harassing notes or postings that might be construed as stalking will be
deleted and made available to the proper law enforcement officials.
- Only post messages once in the appropriate folder. Repeated posts are considered "spamming" and are not allowed.
- No solicitations or unauthorized advertisements are allowed.
Such notes add clutter and devalue conversation. This includes
advertisements for your business, the latest get-rich-quick scheme,
junk or bulk e-mail, chain letters, great jokes, or enticements to
participate in a lottery, contest, or other form of gambling.
Unfortunately, since it is impossible to verify the validity of each
and every organization that solicits donations, we must also prohibit
solicitations for charities.
- You must have copyright ownership of all material that you
post on our bulletin boards and in our chats. No articles, song lyrics,
art, or graphics may be posted without the express written consent of
the copyright holder. You may not infringe on any patent, trademark,
trade secret, right of publicity, or other proprietary right of any
party.
- You own your words.
LauraDavis.net does not claim any right of ownership or copyright to
your posts. By posting on this board, however, you grant LauraDavis.net
a non-exclusive, royalty-free right to reprint any or all of your
comments for any or all of the following purposes: (a) an aggregation
or feature article or book compilation of discussion board comments;
(b) a news or feature story on the site designed to summarize user
commentary; (c) any other manner designed to promote participation in
the community or any other legitimate purpose of LauraDavis.net. Proper
attribution will be included in such use of quotations from your
postings unless the sensitive nature of the quotation is, in
LauraDavis.net's sole discretion, such that anonymity should be
preserved. While LauraDavis.net may choose to copyright publications
containing such quotations, the underlying copyright in the original
quotations remains with you.
- You must respect the privacy of individuals. This means no
posting of phone numbers, addresses, social security numbers, or any
other private information.
- You may not harvest or collect information about the users or
members of this site or use such information for the purpose of
transmitting or facilitating transmission of unsolicited bulk
electronic e-mail or communications.
- It is our policy to remove any posts that contain email sent
to any poster by a member of our staff, or email sent between members
without the consent of both the sender and the recipient.
- You may not impersonate any person or entity, including any employee or representative of LauraDavis.net.
- You may not upload, post, otherwise distribute or facilitate
distribution of any content-including text, communications, software,
images, sounds, data, or other information-that contains software
viruses or any other computer code, files, or programs that are
designed or intended to disrupt, damage, or limit the functioning of
any software, hardware, or telecommunications equipment, or to damage
or obtain unauthorized access to any data or other information of any
third party.
- You may not suggest or encourage illegal activity. LauraDavis.net will assist law enforcement officials.
- You participate at your own risk on the bulletin boards, in
chat and in e-mail. You take responsibility for postings under your
identification and use the information provided here at your own risk.
- LauraDavis.net does not pre-screen, monitor, or edit the
content posted by users of chat rooms, message boards, newsgroups, or
other interactive services that are available through this site.
Because we can't guarantee the accuracy of all posts, LauraDavis.net
holds no responsibility for any misleading or false information and
advice communicated on the boards.
- However, LauraDavis.net reserves the right to remove any
content that, in our judgment, does not comply with our House Rules or
is otherwise harmful, objectionable, or inaccurate. LauraDavis.net is
not responsible for any failure or delay in removing such content.
- Use your common sense and be yourself. Treat other people the
way you would like to be treated and report any problems to us at webmaster@lauradavis.net. Please have a wonderful time at LauraDavis.net
Discussing personal issues with other people requires an atmosphere of trust and safety. The following
guidelines can help create an environment conducive to support and personal sharing:
- A discussion board is not a substitute for therapy. When
relationships are damaged to the point of estrangement, there are often
deep issues that must be worked through before reconciliation can be
considered. Such work should be done in a safe context with a therapist
or qualified counselor. An online discussion board is not a place to
work through the traumas we have suffered. Rather, it is designed for
people who have already resolved much of the pain, grief and anger
associated with their initial injuries.
- Remind each other that the goal of talking is to help people
move toward reconciliation, rather than to provide a forum for
rehashing old injuries. When we talk about estranged relationships, it
can be tempting to go over all of the ways we were wronged and all the
terrible things the other person did to us. Although it is necessary to
come to terms with what happened in the past, discussions focusing on
reconciliation are not the appropriate place to focus on what went
wrong. A brief summary of the circumstances that led to the
estrangement can be useful as part of an initial introduction, but
talking in detail about "who said what to whom" will only reinforce
negative feelings. When your goal is to reconcile, it is best to focus
on what you want to do now and how to best achieve it.
- Respect individual differences. Not everyone approaches
reconciliation in the same way. A successful outcome for one person
might be wrong for someone else. One person might explore her situation
and decide not to pursue a face-to-face reconciliation after all;
another might be willing to make compromises that wouldn't be
acceptable to someone else. A cornerstone of any discussion about
reconciliation must be an underlying sense of respect for people's
individual feelings, responses, and choices.
- The focus of the discussion board should be on sharing and
"listening," rather than on giving advice. None of us knows what is
best for another person. Listen to each other and encourage each other,
but don't tell other people what to do.
- Generally speaking, all of these rules and guidelines simply
require respect and good manners. Respect each other and use common
sense, and you'll feel right at home.
Now that you've made it through all the rules, I encourage you to post away! There's a wonderful world of support
waiting for you here. It's just a click away. And we're eager to share what's in your heart and on your mind.
Come join us!
In the spirit of healing,
P.S. If you come across any post that feels inappropriate or offensive to you, or that is in violation of any
of these guidelines, please report it to webmaster@lauradavis.net
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
